Filed under: eating, health, pain, regression | Tags: breathing, dark, deep, feelings, fish, sea
Beneath the solar plexus
Is where it starts
That is where all the year’s
Undone things crowd for
Warmth, shivering like tramps
Round a spitting petrol drum.
Undone, why? Because I
Filled my cup and bowl too full
Scared that if
Too light
I might float up to the
Surface and, breathing,
See the whole universe.
Things left undone, good things,
Real things,
Like collecting leaves for
Compost or supporting a
Shoulder stand.
Things that require presence in a world
With me at the centre,
Such things are left undone.
Instead, come feelings,
Doubts, thoughts about the size
And shape of things unseen-
THE thing, the tumour- shhhh-
Not that, don’t think it,
What if thoughts be things!
Better to sink back into
The dark Deep for a while,
Where life is lightless and
The bloated stomach cannot
Taste or choose,
Programmed like an angler fish
To digest all passers by
No time to wait for hunger:
A leisure for the light.
Filed under: control, eating, happiness, healing, health, hope | Tags: expecting, host, lefe, next, plan, slow
Patient no longer
lips warm, feet warm
Hands soft and sentient.
Gone is the rumble and
The heart ache within,
here is Life soft and sweet
And ready to eat whole,
Nothing to peel off
or hack through.
Eyes whole, heart WHOLE,
Life long and waiting:
Where have you been?
i’ve been expecting you all this time.’
‘What have you planned for me?’
‘Plan? You’ll see- Be kind
To yourself as you find your way, make it easy and slow, as befits a guest,
Remember, I am Life, your host,
From this life to the next.
Filed under: healing, health | Tags: body, Challenge, floating, phase, thoughts
What phase is this?
Phase four of five?
If the fifth phase is
Complete recovery, what
Is this now?
This is getting used to
being in the present, floating
No current to fight,
No summit to challenge,
No triumph to trumpet.
Just here in the night
With nothing but a notebook
And a duvet
No body to keep me awake,
But thoughts.
Filed under: autogenics, control, earth, hair, healing, health, heat, light, strength, thrill, willpower | Tags: balding, earth, force, life, light, tree
A hot expanse swells below
This cafe floor, my Earth.
Above, if i picture it,
A bulb of light so large it might include a tree-
Between, am I, small and sitting-
Straight, I think, ready channel but feeble
Conductor.
Let Life Force strike light
Through a balding head
Into my woken soul.
Filed under: crystals, destiny, earth, healing, health, hope, intuition, minerals | Tags: citrine, core, earth, powerful, ring, rock, trone
Ring scratched me
Ring chose me
Ring rang bright
When I put it on-
True it rang,
With the truth of light
Filtered through fathomless
Aeons before molten bronze.
‘It’s a very powerful stone’, she said,
It knew me before I new it
It called me to it,
Its point, set in silver, dangled sharp
And chipped top finger flesh,
Exposing backstage blood and raw; but
Flesh flapped back and sealed beneath the ring-
A rock called citrine, post-card from Earth’s core.
Filed under: eating, happiness, healing, health, hope, pain, shame, sleep | Tags: afternoon, cruel, happy, night, shame, sleep, sxplore, tasks
Firm and awake is how I feel,
Now that day is done
And night is
Come to stop
The whirr of consciousness.
Today was easy,
There was no drag,
Low air resistance and I
Soared high, even
At my desk, sat on foam.
After lunch came cruel gut,
Prompting truancy, again
the shame of crunch and swallow-
But it passed and day dawned anew
With afternoon and bloodstream teeming-
Tasks were done and now,
I’m happy to explore the night and trip on sleep, by chance,
Busy looking for a dream.
Filed under: eating, food, happiness, health, hope, thrill | Tags: floats, sense, song, today
Hope fits nicely into Today.
Yesterday was small,
An awkward size, to small to
Hold an egg-
It held salt, as much as filled it, instead.
Hope fits today,
Fills it full, pills
Throb through veins,
Skin drinks up the breeze,
Food floats light and
Sense is song
Happy strings strike happy chords
Haphazardly, and I realise I’m
Making progress and
Heart heaves happy twang!
Filed under: eating, happiness, healing, health | Tags: balnce, disrupts, hunger, seek, steady, thirst
What disrupts balance?
What brings balance?
Perhaps it is not a thing sought but
Rather, the knowing how to seek-
I won’t summon thirst and hunger,
Let them call me when they will,
Let them approach with steady paces,
I’ll greet them them with slow, frugal
Hospitality, and hope they’ll be the kind of guests
Who leave early, to beat the traffic.
Filed under: hair, health, love, shame, thrill | Tags: forehead, hot, mis-placed
Pulsing frame cool against
My hot cheeks burning through
Finger cage of cupped hands.
Fringe spilling over hands held
High to keep out awkward offered affection.
Fringe gaping to expose the shame of
An exaggerated forehead.
With mis-placed hairs in mind
Hot cheeks singe and
The current is fused.
Now, Mascara’s tracks are blurred to bruises
And smiles flake the face,
Like butter too cold for bread.
